Bear Breaks into Bakery

Being Canadian entails more wild life encounters than many countries.

Here, we had a school lockdown; not because of crazed lunatics with weapons but because there was a bear in the neighbourhood. No child could be allowed outside without adult supervision to ensure their safety.

Bears make news because they are generally shy and avoid people... unless they are hungry.

One of my aunts had a bear step on her hand when she was blueberry picking. She was stunned but calm and the bear went on his way.

Berry picking is a higher risk activity because both bears and humans want the juicy fruit. If you visit a blueberry patch and see plants stripped clean of berries, rest assured a bear has been visiting.

My grandparents have a cottage in blueberry country so they have seen plenty of bears.

The story that is most legend was when a bear stepped on my aunt's head.

My two aunts were playing in a pile of discarded brush and sticks. They had created a fort underneath and were hiding inside. All of sudden they heard a thumping running noise; a bear cub was running away, terrified, from some people. He ran over the pile of brush and his paw broke through to step on my aunt's head. He scrambled down to the entrance of the fort to head inside and came face to face with my terrified aunts.

They screamed at the face of the bear peering into the fort. My grandmother heard their screams and came tearing out of the cottage.

Thankfully the bear took off and no one was hurt. We still laugh at that story.

This news article about a bear breaking into a bakery triggered some of my bear recollections. Unfortunately there was no video of the event but I did track down a video of a bear at a Subway restaurant.

Bear Breaks into Bakery

TOBERMORY, Ont. - The owner of a bakery in Tobermory, Ont., has had a few sleepless nights after a black bear broke into the shop.

The bruin was first discovered last Friday enjoying some cookies as he sat atop a freezer at the Little Tub Bakery.

The Ministry of Natural Resources set a trap.

The owner of the shop says he woke up early today to loud noises as the bear got caught in the trap.

Wayne Hadcock says it was hard to get back to sleep because the bear was banging his body against the cage, trying to escape.

The bear is now in the custody of the Natural Resources Ministry.

Original article can be found here

This video shows a bear visiting a Subway restaurant in British Columbia, Canada.

Hoofbeats

I was awoken yesterday by the sound of a large animal and hooves clattering on the pavement. Unfortunately, I wasn't fast enough to catch a glimpse of what it was... but I suspect a deer.

However, this little creature has been hopping around for a while.


I wish bunnies ate dandelions. He would be one well fed little fellow!

Moose Lips

My lunch lately has consisted of sandwiches with grilled vegetables. Grilled zucchini and eggplant with fresh tomatoes. They are very summery sandwiches. I opened my lunch yeasterday and you know what two grilled eggplant slices look like when they hang out of the sandwich?

Moose lips.

Moose lips have been on my mind lately.

I read Hilary Clintons biography, which I enjoyed immensely. She wrote about the time she attended a Russian dinner and was served a soup with gelatinous moose lips floating in the broth. She wrote "I tasted a lot of unusual food for my country, but I drew the line at moose lips” She couldn't eat the moose lips for her country ... or for Boris Yeltsin.

After that passage, my dreams had been filled with wormy looking purply lips floating in my lunch time soup.

But, unlike Hilary Clinton, I know that I could eat moose lips for my country. After all I've practiced on eggplant.

Chipmunk Victory

Chipmunks 1, Humans 0

I purchased more Mason jars in anticipation of making red currant jam. Too late. I don't know how that chipmunk fits down into his little burrow. With the amount of raiding he is doing, he should be waddling. At least I know he is a healthy organically fed chipmunk.

On the other hand, we discovered why we had a squirrel invasion this week. Squirrels were scampering across our deck every five minutes. My husband didn't think anything of it until he saw one with a plastic bag. Was it shopping in the neighbourhood?

Nope, turns out that we forgot a bag of peanuts in our breezeway and the squirrels squirmed their way inside. My husband removed the bag and two ticked off squirrels were swearing at him when he took it away. Not that he understands squirrel language but hubby said their angry gestures spoke volumes.

He is Italian after all.

Lavender

It appears that Mr. Chipmunk does not like lavender and I have a bounty crop. I'm rolling up my sleeves to make a Lavender Honey Rice Pudding with Belgian Chocolate. We've already eaten the first batch. It was good, but not great. I need to tweak the flavouring ... coming soon.

Chipmunk Wars

I'm at war with a chipmunk. It's a race to see who will get the red currants first. He has already eaten the sunflowers, lupins and nibbled on a few other choice things. If he weren't so darn cute....

Which one of us will be the winner? The berries are almost ready for jamming. How come he won't eat the rhubarb? I'm more than happy to share rhubarb.

Moose Meat Art

Truckers Guide to Art

Be patient. This is a long winded post.

There are only three main categories of art in the world. Yep, three. And the big secret is that anyone can appreciate, dissect and discuss art with these guidelines to the three categories.

First of all, let me point out my qualifications to spout off on this theory. I am bourgeois. The first time I started wearing black was when my marks in art school started slipping. My plaid flannel shirt and my story of the moose hanging in our yard were just not cutting the mustard. I wore black; my marks went up. This isn’t a direct correlation – I actually was more industrious. But it’s a lot funnier to think that black equals success in art. I only wear black turtle necks now because I’m older and I’m hoping it will bind my second chin to my neck.

I call my three principles of art “The Truckers Guide to Art” because truckers are known to travel from point A to point B in the most direct, efficient and practical manner possible. Also, I’m sure a trucker would run me over if I started expounding polysyllabic art theories… but if I had a good moose story I might earn some respect.

Let’s move onto the three categories of art. There is lookin’ art, thinkin’ art and feelin’ art. That’s it.

First of all, do you like the way it looks? It doesn’t have to be pretty to appeal to you. You may not like the look of art in galleries but if you are choosing art for your home you should like the way it looks. Under this guideline feel free to choose the art that matches your sofa and chairs. This is your home, your domain and you are king. Anybody can have an opinion on the way art looks. Remember, just because you like a picture doesn’t mean you want to see it everyday. An execution scene over your breakfast nook may encourage you to clean your plate but at what price? Put it in the washroom and admonish visitors to wash their hands.

Lookin’ art becomes more complicated once you start talking about line, composition, form, and balance. Those are some of the ingredients to lookin’ art. The more art educated a person is, the more they can endlessly expand and dissect these ingredients. Think of a chef endlessly singing the praises of Dijon mustard. If you aren’t very art educated, don’t worry about it too much. You don’t have to look under the hood to appreciate the look of a Ferrari.

The second type of art is feelin’ art. It draws out (pun intended) a reaction from the viewer. Imagine the churches of hundreds of years ago and the sculpture, stonework, tapestries and paintings that crammed those stone walls. A lot of those gargoyles were there just to scare the living daylights out of the peasants.

On the other hand, art can inspire, comfort, calm and stimulate. It can even disgust. A rotting meat dress could inspire the viewer to regurgitate their own contribution on the gallery floor. Unintended, but oddly natural feedback*.

Your reaction is personal. Public art and private art are two different animals. One is a beast that you may not want in your house and the other gives feeling to your personal space. In your house it’s your party, feel whatever you want. But don’t expect the feeling to be mutual.

Thinkin’ art can be a lot more complicated. An artist may create art with symbols, mathematical theory, theology, history and layers and layers of meaning. An art critic should be the translator and interpreter for the public because goodness knows; there is a lot of art theory out there. Thinkin’ art requires more current book learnin’ than most of us have. A good interpreter would be able to help us discover the value of thinkin’ art. Isn’t it frustrating when they obfuscate? It’s even worse when you don’t know the meaning of the word obfuscate.

Thinkin’ theory can be fun mental gymnastics… as long as you don’t stretch so far your mind snaps. Your mind will snap faster if you haven’t warmed it up. Be warned.

I’m thinkin’ that a masterpiece should span all three categories. There would be a lot of thinkin’, feelin’ and lookin’ going on in a masterpiece. It’s a great theory to put to the trucker test. What would a trucker do when looking at a potential masterpiece?

If this theory doesn’t work for you, wanna hear a moose story?



References

polysyllabic – big words, lots of sounds

*Vanitas: Flesh Dress for an Albino Anorectic by Jana Sterbak, shown at National Gallery in Ottawa, NOT moose meat... I hope

obfuscate – obscure, darken, as in keep you in the dark

BTW - my dad used to drive a truck for an art gallery