Delinquents

Shove over juvenile delinquents, grandma and grandpa are moving into your territory.

Every time there is theft or vandalism in my neighbourhood everyone bobs their head while sighing about the state of youngsters today. Where are the parents? Children learn at the knee of their parents so the parents are obviously derelict in their duty.

Parents? Are you sure that's the example youngesters are following?

The most brazen examples of theft I've witnessed are from the seniors in the neighbourhood. I live in a place blessed with gorgeous gardens. Little did I know that the price of a garden was paid in contraband.

I stopped one senior in her tracks as she bent over to pluck plants from my garden to add to her already generous bouquet. "What ARE you doing?" She jumped back, apologized profusely and went on her way. I wish that had been the only time I'd seen illicit harvesting, but it wasn't.

From the little old lady skipping along the path with a fistful of daffodils from the city garden to the grandparents accompanying their grandchildren as they strip flowers off the plants, each one seemed to think gardens were public property to be plundered at will.

Gardens ARE publicly provocative in displaying their glory. Maybe it's the equivalent of wearing a short skirt and having a dirty old man sneak a little pinch on the crowded bus. Shame.

I am doing my part to combat this grey crime wave by growing a brazen carpet of dandelions in every spare nook and cranny of my garden. I'm pretty proud of my success.

So far, not one dandelion is missing.